6 Lessons that Level-Up My Life
- Christine O'Dea
- Dec 4, 2017
- 6 min read
Editor's Note: Christine is a multi-talented, extremely accomplished young person from New Jersey. She has lived in over 3 countries, wrote for several travel/music/media/lifestyle blogs (one of which she created), speaks 4 languages, graduated from Hofstra University with a degree in Mass Media Studies, been featured in magazines, climbed Mount Fuji... the list goes on! She's also someone we'd consider a "modern day philosopher". So, we asked her to share her favorite life lessons, gleaned from her fascinating 25 years on this planet so far. Here is what she shared...
1. Sometimes all I have to do is change my mind.
It really is that simple. The way I perceive everything can be different the moment I decide to make it so. In any situation, with any problem, for each time I look in the mirror and feel unhappy, there is an easy practice to bring what I see to a place that is positive: change my mind. One by one, I try to recognize the negative thoughts that cloud my mind. Then, disregard them and soon they will disappear.
For example, if I have a thought about how I am *insert negative word here*, I simply tell myself I'm not. And I find all the reasons to support the latter. If I think I had a *insert negative word here* day, I remind myself that I didn’t. I start looking at things all sorts of ways and realize I have the power to create my world from the inside out. The hard part is not change itself. The challenge is in creating and keeping a mindset and an environment that allows for positive thoughts. It takes time and effort. It takes consistency and dedication. It takes good timing. Sometimes it takes money. And sometimes it takes help from others. But the bottom line is simple: Just start. Change happens over time, all the time, whether or not we want it. What we have to learn is to see the good in what it brings. After all, changing the world starts with changing the way we look at it.
2. Surrendering to an experience is the best way to get the most out of it.
Recently I ran my first full marathon and in the weeks prior I asked some experienced marathoners for their words of wisdom. The best piece of advice I received had nothing to do with how to run better or faster, what to do to stay energized, or even anything that related to running. It was this: Take it all in while it’s happening. On race day, and many times in life, the ultimate goal is to get to a certain point, to somewhere, wherever it is. But so often we only want to make it to the finish line that we overlook what it took to get there. To be in every moment, even when my whole body ached and all I wanted was for it to end, was the best decision I made. Realizing that this moment is now, and that arriving at the destination would be another, helped me to embrace the race itself, along with all the hard work I put into it. Be in every moment. Revel in your feelings. Celebrate joys and pains. Appreciate them when they’re there, because they come and go, and sometimes they only come by once.
3. Look for balance.
I learned a lot of contradicting lessons growing up. To encourage me, my mom said, “Your fate is in your hands.” But when I encountered failure, she said, “There are some things you can’t control. Everything happens for a reason.” When I had relationship problems, my friends said, “Love isn’t easy.” But other times they said, “If love is real, you’ll know and it will come naturally.” My yoga teachers tell me often, “Believe and trust in the goodness of the universe.” But they also say, “To make a change, you must question everything.”
With all of these opposing expressions, I had a lot of trouble understanding why so many of the life principles I thought were so simple, actually challenge each other. And I discovered that the reason is simple: life is unpredictable. There are always two sides to a story, two lenses to a vision, and countless ways to perceive. What I’ve learned as I’ve bounced between beliefs, is that balance can be key. We can use these common phrases as aids or explanations for our experiences, but not necessarily as an excuse or end-all be-all way of thinking. There is always a middle. And in a world where people seem so divided, it’s important to remember that we are all, both at the same time, different and the same. The reason we are so different is because all of our beliefs, priorities, opinions, preferences, and ideas don’t line up. And perhaps they shouldn’t. But the balance is there, and if we find it in ourselves to understand that, we might just find a reason to come together.
4. It’s as important to be in the moment as it is to step back from it.
Sometimes we get caught up in our feelings. Whether it’s a positive or negative feeling, anger or bliss, or even nothingness, there is value in understanding how we reached it. Knowing the path that took us there will help us to either recreate it or avoid it. Retracing steps will also bring a new frame of reference that will help figure out what is meaningful to us as individuals. Was the journey to this happiness what I expected? Were the challenges that taught me this feeling of regret worth it? What does any of this mean, and how can I move closer to answering that?
When I climbed Mount Fuji and reached the summit a few summers ago, I felt unstoppable. And I forgot all about the last two days of climbing I did, during which I felt tested and pushed. But in retrospect, my gratitude for both the climb and the summit are equal because of how strongly they made me feel such opposite emotions. I realized then that we feel alive at our worst just as we do at our best, and forgetting that is really easy. A lot of people think that optimism and positivism means ignoring anything that is negative. Truthfully, owning and acknowledging worry, fear, and failure, serves a significant purpose in pursuing a healthy lifestyle. It helps us recognize that life naturally unfolds in ups and downs and while there’s no way to avoid it, there is a way to step back, see it, and be accepting of it.
5. Life starts, and ends, with breath.
When you learn to control your breath, you learn to control your life. In yoga and meditation we are taught to practice breathing. It’s a funny concept really. Practice breathing? It’s the most natural action that comes with being alive and yet, we need to practice? Soon I realized that the breath is more than just a repetition of necessary inhales and exhales, but an expression. We can show emotion with a single breath, a deep sigh, a prolonged exhale. We can show frustration and contentment, anxiety and loss of control. With practice, I learned how to feel my breathing. Every moment, every movement, each in and each out. Somehow, this helped me to focus on and to feel who I am. I found importance and uniqueness in myself, and knowing my own breath brought me confidence, self respect, and a reason to continue being the best version of myself that I can. Our breath is our life, and if we are able to control it, then it cannot control us.
6. The sun is a simple source of joy.
Since my teenage years I’ve had a strong love for the enormous ball of fire that we make circles around every year. It gives us light and life and it is, in my opinion, the greatest source of good love in our universe. It sets a great example for how we could be: constantly giving, glowing, shining, and bright. Scientifically, the sun is what makes everything possible. It makes Earth move with a little pull. It gives plants food. It warms our oceans. It gives us energy and vitamins and a happiness we can’t always explain. It lights up an entire planet, and when it touches the horizon paints a new picture. It is needed by every part of nature, and it is powerful. It is a simple, magical part of life, and a beautiful reminder that we are loved and looked out for always.
Comments